Today has probably been by far one of the most boring days! I'm used to being busy on the weekends but I'm just dying here. I could go walking or call someone up but I guess it's me that is making me bored! If that makes any sense. Hummm..I have been thinking. Oh, I finally got the courage to call up seth last night. lol It' took me a whole fifteen minutes. I'm not used to calling guys first. haha It's supposed to the be the other way around! He didn't pick up. I think he may have been working. I'm not sure. I know how guys feel now when a girl gives them their number! Even if only friends! I don't know. It's like diving into water and not knowing how deep. I have realized a lot of new things lately. I asked to see the truth and that's what I am being shown. Last night during meditation I couldn't control myself. All these thoughts and feelings came through. I saw an image of Lindsey, the little girl I had babysat along with my mother for a number of years, I saw how things used to be. She was like my little sister. I miss her but I have kept her off my mind for so long, It was like I forgot her existance...even for what seemed a moment. That's one thing I have been hiding within myself that I haven't even realized. I looked at the flordia pictures this morning and last night. I couldn't help but cry; crying for wanting to be there at this very moment and cry because that was SUCH a big turning point in my life. That was the first time my selfishness has reflected love back onto me. This is the story. My sister and I were riding to Clearwater, FL by greyhound bus. We ran low on money because of a few bad circumstances. On our way back from our short trip, I had bought my last pack of cookies with my last dollar. An older man to my left had asked me for a cookie. I was thinking if I should or not. That was going to be my breakfast, lunch, and dinner all in one. I said no and I explained myself. Then, later on in the day my sister and I were sitting at the greyhound station in the restaurant area. We were conversing about how hungry we were. That same man sat $10 on our table and didn't say anything. It's amazing how kind people can be. I learned SO much from that. Life is just weird sometimes but I am learning so much in the process.
Alicia

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